If you're in my generation or before, possibly a smidge after, you know what comes to mind when you hear the letters ADHD. One exasperated adult whispers to another, "Oh, that one bouncing off the walls over there? He's ADD." The other nods knowingly and whispers back, "That explains a lot. Did he not take his meds today? His poor parents." But that wasn't me. Unless you were "the problem kid," the idea you were ADD or ADHD was ludicrous. Other terms were used: head in the clouds, space cadet, lazy, forgetful, irresponsible.
Fast forward many years. Many years of misplacing things. Many years of assignments taking three times as long as they should have and sometimes never turned in. Many years of brutal standardized tests. Many years of frustratingly long and confusing meetings. Many years of documents I couldn't force myself to focus on. Many, many years. And as the time passed, ADHD was split into three main categories: hyperactive/impulsive, inattentive/distractible, and combo.
And my friends, that inattentive/distractible was me to a T. Concentrating on anything, especially things I found boring, for a long period of time was a Herculean task. I would see coworkers accomplishing incredible feats of progress while I was slogging through step one for the fifth time. The most disheartening moments were when I would read from fellow authors on Twitter or blogposts or see interviews on TV and they would talk about their writing sessions lasting for hours when I would struggle to make it a singular hour on a good day. I'd naturally found ways coping and would sometimes accidentally hit the mental jackpot and make miraculous progress on tasks, but those moments were few and far between.
Then a couple of months ago, I realized I could do something about it. I went to the doctor and he laughed, "Yeah, you sound like a pretty classic case of ADHD inattentive/distractible." We talked about meds and dosage, and good lord, this is what focus is like?!? The first couple of days, everything was on overdrive. I had the jitters as though I'd drank five cups of coffee in half an hour. I could feel the end of my hair. But I was getting shit done! Thankfully, the high-octane sensations have calmed (though admittedly, they were sort of fun), but the level of focus has remained the same. It's been life changing for me.
One of the most endearing things about this process is I'm discovering a community of adults who've been in the same boat . . . we were all just too distracted to see each other. Thankfully, the stigma seems to be wearing off and people are realizing we can care for ourselves and take the action needed to give ourselves a healthy boost. And the more stories I hear from adults who've discovered they're ADHD later in life, the more comforting it is. It's a fun and whacky little distractible community.
I don't intend to stay on the meds for the long run and I don't take them while on holiday unless I want to sit down and knock out some writing. Even then I might only take half my dosage. But while I am taking it, I'm also working at building better habits. Taking notes, journaling, setting reminders, siphoning off errant thoughts onto paper so I can move on, and taking action on major things right away. The day will come when I choose to not take the meds anymore, and when it comes I want to be ready for it.
TheminiADHDcoach.com is a great resource if you're wondering if you might be part of the fun ADHD community or want to read some great perspective shifting blogs.
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